What Makes a "Great" President?

Atlanta, GA

February 13, 2021

Today we pour some coffee, settle in, and have a little fun. 

Years ago, tiring of conventional wisdom and political propaganda, I wrote some sketches of the more prominent presidents to whom almost every American reflexively bends the knee. 

As I did, I realized that the universal admiration (or revulsion) many of these men now receive says more about our modern sensibilities, and prevailing perspectives on the proper rôle of government, than it does about the constitutional merits of any president’s performance. 

Most of those we are supposed to consider “great” regularly engaged in outright atrocities, and undertook actions that in the private sphere would be universally condemned as criminal. But because these acts were committed from behind a presidential seal, the repulsive policies made “statesmen” of the men who authorized them. 

Likewise, the presidents establishment historians least respect are those who held back, respected limits, and deferred to state or legislative authority. Our modern Plutarchs view these men as weaklings who shrank from the moment. Accordingly, they occupy the bottom rungs of their presidential rankings. 

Everyone likes to compile and argue about lists: Who are the best pitchers of all time (after Greg Maddux)? The greatest quarterbacks (aside from Joe Montana)? Our favorite cities (other than Paris)? Best composers (excluding Mozart)? Greatest basketball players (besides Michael Jordan)? Top movies (excepting either Godfather)? Best rock albums (barring Exile on Main Street)? Best winemakers (outside Walla Walla)?

These are the debates we love to have, at the bar, over dinner…or in a silly diary. This week, which features one of the dumbest, most inconsequential holidays of the year, we consult our inner-Schlesinger, and catalog our presidents. To do so, I have pulled out and re-polished several of the sketches I previously wrote.

But our inner-Schlesinger is an alter-ego of those court historians…père et fils…who popularized presidential rankings in the 20th century. 

Unlike those hagiographers, we are wary of righteous rulers, and contemptuous of those who have all the answers to every problem…most of which they themselves imagined or caused. We want leaders who appreciate their ignorance, and respect their doubts. We value humility rather than grandiosity, fidelity instead of certainty.

This week’s holiday had an honorable origin, but…like fine wine at a frat party…it was defiled, diluted, and debased till it finally went bad. It has been perverted from a worthy occasion honoring a great man into a long weekend commemorating an assortment of awful ones. 

The third Monday in February is still officially designated Washington’s Birthday, but is known colloquially as “Presidents Day”, as if being president was Washington’s most notable accomplishment. 

The best thing he did as president was to stop being president. Voluntarily giving up power after a second term set an admirable precedent, and echoed his earlier act of relinquishing his commission and retiring his sword. 

When he did so, King George couldn’t believe it. “If this is true”, said the mad monarch, “then he is truly the greatest man who ever lived.”

Washington was a great man. But was he a great president? Relative to the host of charlatans, hacks, and crooks that infest our own era, he was Solon and Solomon rolled into one. Still…like a subterranean Speakeasy…that’s a low bar.

Our criteria will be loftier, yet simple. We will judge a president by how well he upheld his oath of office, how much wealth he left untouched, and how few people he managed to kill. That alone should whittle from the list most of the deadwood that’s washed ashore since Coolidge.

Let’s start with this disclaimer: I don’t think there should be a president. I am more a fan of the Articles of Confederation than of the US Constitution.

I realize that under the Articles there were eight presidents “under Congress assembled”. But none of them ever presumed to launch a war, meddle in the affairs of individual citizens, or tell people they couldn’t travel.

But even under the Constitution, we’d probably be fine if only it were followed. Alas, it hasn’t been for over a century and a half. Yet that doesn’t let the Constitution off the hook. As Lysander Spooner said, the Constitution either permits what has happened or has been powerless to stop it. Either way, it is unfit to exist. 

But it does exist…on paper at least. And it includes a president. Since the Constitution was adopted, there have been forty-five of them (not forty-six: Grover Cleveland wasn’t two different guys).

It’s hard to come up with ten good presidents, and difficult to limit ourselves to ten bad ones. Since the branches hang heavy with foul fruit, let’s first relieve the tree of its rotten apples. 

A good heuristic when evaluating presidents is that the ones Academia, the Literati, and establishment historians consider “great”…those who are universally admired by both sides of our narrow political spectrum…are almost invariably scoundrels. As Lord Acton said, “great men are almost always bad men.”

Which brings us, in chronological order, to our rouge’s gallery…with a brief explanation of why each reprobate made the roster. 

Tomorrow, we begin the list…

JD